so tell me that I'm special
and that you really care
and when you leave tonight
I'll solemnly swear...
to live life to its fullest
to live life for love
to be your special someone
and dance with you
til the end of our days
the second and fourth lines of the first stanza rhyme together so when the second and fourth lines of the second stanza don't rhyme, it kind of jolts me. was that the intent?
Umm the intent was actually totally lacking in intent. I generally tend not to stick to rhyme schemes because I kinda loathe rhymey poems even if all of my poems are like that. Actually, that's probably why I do hate them. Maybe hate is too strong. Well anyways, it doesn't really have a point other than flow. I could have used rhyming words with the same flow and to the same effect, but I didn't. I actually don't like the second stanza. I think
to live life to its fullest to live life for your love to be your special someone and dance with you for always
the second and fourth lines of the first stanza rhyme together so when the second and fourth lines of the second stanza don't rhyme, it kind of jolts me. was that the intent?
ReplyDeleteUmm the intent was actually totally lacking in intent. I generally tend not to stick to rhyme schemes because I kinda loathe rhymey poems even if all of my poems are like that. Actually, that's probably why I do hate them. Maybe hate is too strong. Well anyways, it doesn't really have a point other than flow. I could have used rhyming words with the same flow and to the same effect, but I didn't. I actually don't like the second stanza. I think
ReplyDeleteto live life to its fullest
to live life for your love
to be your special someone
and dance with you for always
til the end of our days
would be better. What do you think?
yes, i do like that better.
ReplyDeletehmmm editing is fun! haha =D. Thank you for your input Andrew
ReplyDelete